{"id":265,"date":"2025-01-22T13:43:57","date_gmt":"2025-01-22T13:43:57","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/prank.ro\/blog\/?p=265"},"modified":"2025-01-27T13:44:55","modified_gmt":"2025-01-27T13:44:55","slug":"cele-mai-bune-bancuri-cu-vampiri","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/prank.ro\/blog\/bancuri\/cele-mai-bune-bancuri-cu-vampiri\/","title":{"rendered":"Cele mai bune bancuri cu vampiri"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p><strong>1.\u00cen cimitir, groparul s\u0103pa lini\u015ftit \u015fi din c\u00e2nd \u00een c\u00e2nd mai tr\u0103gea \u015fi din \u0163igar\u0103.<\/strong><br>La un moment dat vede cum dintr-un morm\u00e2nt iese o m\u00e2n\u0103.<br>Sap\u0103 \u015fi fumeaz\u0103 \u00een continuare lini\u015ftit. Nu dup\u0103 mult timp din p\u0103m\u00e2nt iese mortul cu totul.<br>Groparul sap\u0103 \u015fi fumeaz\u0103 \u00een continuare lini\u015ftit. Mortul \u00eencearc\u0103 s\u0103 \u00eel sperie.<br>Groparul sap\u0103 \u015fi fumeaz\u0103 \u00een continuare lini\u015ftit. Vede mortul c\u0103 nu are ce s\u0103-i fac\u0103, se \u00eendreapt\u0103 spre gardul cimitirului \u015fi vrea s\u0103 sar\u0103.<br>Dintr-o dat\u0103 se treze\u015fte cu ditamai lopata dup\u0103 ceaf\u0103.<br>Groparul:<br>&#8211; R\u00e2dem, glumim, da&#8217; nu p\u0103r\u0103sim incinta.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>2. Doi vampiri se \u00eent\u00e2lnesc la poarta cimitirului:<\/strong><br>\u2013 Ie\u015fim la o plimbare?<br>\u2013 Stai un pic s\u0103 m\u0103 duc s\u0103 iau piatra funerar\u0103 cu mine\u2026<br>\u2013 Dar ce \u0163i-a venit?!<br>\u2013 Nu-mi place s\u0103 umblu f\u0103r\u0103 buletin pe strad\u0103.<br><br><strong>3.Ofi\u0163erul de poli\u0163ie:<\/strong><br>&#8211; \u015ei ce crezi c\u0103 faci pe acest drum, Dracula?<br>Dracula:<br>&#8211; C\u0103utam artera principal\u0103, domnule ofi\u0163er.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>4.Care-i diferen\u0163a dintre un avocat \u015fi un vampir?<\/strong><br>Vampirul \u00ee\u0163i suge s\u00e2ngele numai noaptea&#8230;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>5.Trei vampiri mor\u0163i de foame.<\/strong><br>Zice unul:<br>\u2013 B\u0103, tre\u2019 s\u0103 facem ceva c\u0103 nu se mai poate. Noaptea nu iese nimic \u015fi suntem termina\u0163i. Trebuie s\u0103 ac\u0163ion\u0103m ziua.<br>Zis \u015fi f\u0103cut.<br>Se duce primul.<br>Trece o or\u0103, trec dou\u0103, trei, trece o zi, trec dou\u0103 \u015fi se \u00eentoarce plin de s\u00e2nge, s\u0103tul, mul\u0163umit.<br>\u2013 Cum ai f\u0103cut, b\u0103, nenorocitule? Spune-ne \u015fi nou\u0103!<br>\u2013 P\u0103i, vede\u0163i oile alea de acolo?<br>\u2013 Da.<br>\u2013 La toate le-am supt s\u00e2ngele.<br>Ceilal\u0163i doi:<br>\u2013 B\u0103, tre\u2019 s\u0103 facem \u015fi noi ceva, uit\u0103-te la nenorocitul \u0103la, cum a reu\u015fit!<br>Se duce \u015fi al doilea. Trece o or\u0103, trec dou\u0103, trei, patru, trece o zi \u015fi se \u00eentoarce \u015fi \u0103sta, plin de s\u00e2nge, s\u0103tul.<br>\u2013 Cum ai f\u0103cut m\u0103, \u015fi tu?<br>\u2013 P\u0103i, vede\u0163i vacile alea de-acolo?<br>\u2013 Da.<br>\u2013 La toate le-am supt s\u00e2ngele.<br>\u2013 B\u0103, tre\u2019 s\u0103 fac \u015fi eu ceva c\u0103 nu se mai poate, se hot\u0103r\u00ee ultimul.<br>Pleac\u0103 \u015fi el, trece un minut, trec dou\u0103, dup\u0103 cinci minute se \u00eentoarce, tot plin de s\u00e2nge.<br>\u2013 B\u0103, dar tu cum ai reu\u015fit a\u015fa de repede?<br>\u2013 P\u0103i, vede\u0163i st\u00e2nca aia de-acolo?<br>\u2013 Da.<br>\u2013 Eu n-am v\u0103zut-o\u2026<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>1.\u00cen cimitir, groparul s\u0103pa lini\u015ftit \u015fi din c\u00e2nd \u00een c\u00e2nd mai tr\u0103gea \u015fi din \u0163igar\u0103.La un moment dat vede cum dintr-un morm\u00e2nt iese o m\u00e2n\u0103.Sap\u0103 \u015fi fumeaz\u0103 \u00een continuare lini\u015ftit. Nu dup\u0103 mult timp din p\u0103m\u00e2nt iese mortul cu totul.Groparul sap\u0103 \u015fi fumeaz\u0103 \u00een continuare lini\u015ftit. Mortul \u00eencearc\u0103 s\u0103 \u00eel sperie.Groparul sap\u0103 \u015fi fumeaz\u0103 \u00een [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":236,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[2],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-265","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-bancuri"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/prank.ro\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/265","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/prank.ro\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/prank.ro\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/prank.ro\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/prank.ro\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=265"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/prank.ro\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/265\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":266,"href":"https:\/\/prank.ro\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/265\/revisions\/266"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/prank.ro\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/236"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/prank.ro\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=265"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/prank.ro\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=265"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/prank.ro\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=265"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}