{"id":132,"date":"2025-01-15T19:44:05","date_gmt":"2025-01-15T19:44:05","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/prank.ro\/blog\/liliputanul\/bancuri-noi-de-inceput-de-toamna\/"},"modified":"2025-01-15T19:44:05","modified_gmt":"2025-01-15T19:44:05","slug":"bancuri-noi-de-inceput-de-toamna","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/prank.ro\/blog\/liliputanul\/bancuri-noi-de-inceput-de-toamna\/","title":{"rendered":"Bancuri noi de \u00eenceput de toamn\u0103"},"content":{"rendered":"<div>\n<p>La un restaurant, o mam\u0103 st\u0103 la mas\u0103 cu copila\u015ful ei de 10 ani. Copilul se joac\u0103 proste\u015fte cu o moned\u0103 de 10 bani, o bag\u0103 \u00een gur\u0103, \u015fi la un moment dat o \u00eenghite din gre\u015feal\u0103. \u00cencepe s\u0103 tu\u015feasc\u0103 \u015fi se pare c\u0103 se asfixiaz\u0103. Mama strig\u0103 dup\u0103 ajutor, \u00een timp ce copilul \u00eencepe s\u0103 se \u00eenvine\u0163easc\u0103.<br \/>\nDe la o mas\u0103 vecin\u0103 sare un domn, \u00eei trage copilului pantalonii jos \u015fi \u00eel str\u00e2nge tare de testicule! Copilul url\u0103 de durere \u015fi scuip\u0103 moneda din g\u00e2t. Mama e uluit\u0103 \u015fi, dup\u0103 c\u00e2teva minute, \u00ee\u015fi revine din spaim\u0103 \u015fi, g\u00e2tuit\u0103 de emo\u0163ii \u00eei mul\u0163ume\u015fte domnului:<br \/>\n\u2013 A\u0163i fost extraordinar, credeam c\u0103 o s\u0103-mi moar\u0103 copilul! Sunte\u0163i medic?<br \/>\n\u2013 Nu, doamn\u0103. Lucrez la fisc.<\/p>\n<p>***<\/p>\n<p>Un tip se duce la magazin s\u0103 cumpere o para\u0219ut\u0103.<br \/>\n\u2013 Buna ziua, a\u0219 dori o para\u0219ut\u0103.<br \/>\n\u2013 Bine, iat\u0103, cea mai bun\u0103 pentru dumneavoastr\u0103.<br \/>\n\u2013 \u0218i cum o deschid c\u00eend sunt in zbor?<br \/>\n\u2013 Trage\u021bi de tr\u0103gaciul verde.<br \/>\n\u2013 \u0218i dac\u0103 nu se deschide?<br \/>\n\u2013 Trageti de cel ro\u0219u.<br \/>\n\u2013 \u0218i dac\u0103 nici dup\u0103 asta nu se deschide?<br \/>\n\u2013 O aduce\u021bi \u00eenapoi \u0219i v-o schimb\u0103m cu alta.<\/p>\n<p>***<\/p>\n<p>Un avicultor merge la barul local \u0219i se a\u0219eaz\u0103 pe singurul scaun liber, l\u00eeng\u0103 o femeie. Comand\u0103 o sticl\u0103 de \u0219ampanie, iar femeia de l\u00eeng\u0103 el spune:<br \/>\n\u2013 Ce interesant, \u0219i eu am comandat tot sampanie.<br \/>\n\u2013 Ce coinciden\u021b\u0103, spune avicultorul. E o zi speciala pentru mine \u0219i am vrut s\u0103 s\u0103rb\u0103toresc.<br \/>\n\u2013 \u0218i pentru mine e o zi special\u0103, spune femeia. \u0218i eu s\u00eent aici s\u0103 s\u0103rb\u0103toresc.<br \/>\n\u2013 Ce coinciden\u021b\u0103, spune avicultorul.<br \/>\n\u00cen timp ce ciocnesc paharele, el o \u00eentreab\u0103 pe femeie:<br \/>\n\u2013 Tu ce s\u0103rb\u0103tore\u0219ti?<br \/>\n\u2013 So\u021bul meu \u0219i cu mine am tot \u00eencercat s\u0103 avem copii ani de zile, iar ast\u0103zi, ginecologul mi-a spus c\u0103 sunt \u00eens\u0103rcinat\u0103.<br \/>\n\u2013 Ce coinciden\u021b\u0103, spune b\u0103rbatul, eu sunt avicultor \u0219i timp de mul\u021bi ani de zile g\u0103inile mele f\u0103ceau ou\u0103 infertile, iar acum toate au f\u0103cut ou\u0103 fertile.<br \/>\n\u2013 Oh, dar asta e minunat, spune femeia. Ce ai f\u0103cut pentru ca g\u0103inile tale s\u0103 devin\u0103 fertile?<br \/>\n\u2013 Am schimbat coco\u0219ul. R\u0103spunde omul.<br \/>\n\u2013 Ce coinciden\u021b\u0103! R\u0103spunde femeia z\u00eembind.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<div>La un restaurant, o mam\u0103 st\u0103 la mas\u0103 cu copila\u015ful ei de 10 ani.<\/div>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-132","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-liliputanul"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/prank.ro\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/132","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/prank.ro\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/prank.ro\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/prank.ro\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/prank.ro\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=132"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/prank.ro\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/132\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/prank.ro\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=132"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/prank.ro\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=132"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/prank.ro\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=132"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}